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Primitive God

by Chris Ballew

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1.
JUST UNTWIST kittens mittens flowers loving laughing smiling beaming shining flying landing resting dreaming breathing falling floating sinking my mommy and my daddy never told me I could just untwist fluffy happy bouncy puffy growing blooming bursting open cooing napping stretching flowing touching holding safely knowing my mommy and my daddy never told me I could just untwist puppies duckies ponies birdies babies chickies cuteness beaming tiny little funny monkeys hugging giggling dancing sleeping my mommy and my daddy never told me I could just untwist stopping floating hanging turning seeing being reeling feeling sensing empty dropping nothing nothing nothing nothing nothing my mommy and my daddy never told me I could just untwist that I could just untwist that I could just untwist that I could just untwist that I could just untwist
2.
PRIMITIVE GOD all that I hear when I listen is a primitive god all that I hear when I listen is a primitive god and I see what you mean there's gotta be a creator pulling the strings and I wish I could see what you see when you told me that your heart can break and bleed all that I hear when I listen is a primitive god all that I hear when I listen is a primitive god I'm leaving my receiver hot and open and on all that I hear when I listen is a primitive god and I love that you believe in a safety net that you can't touch or see and I feel your stress and fear you tried to save my soul when I disappeared and I know that you hurt at the thought of losing your mind and turning to dirt and I do admire your drive you say screw you to death and you stay alive
3.
COLD COLD SHEETS maybe you're gone and maybe you're not and maybe I'm still in a dream I got the house to myself I got a heaven and hell I got a space where you used to be I got a heart that beats I got a memory I got nothing 'cause noting is free I move the pillows around I listen close for a sound of you breathing next to me but you're gone cold cold sheets lying next to me all that you left me were the cold cold sheets cold cold sheets lying next to me cold cold sheets when you disapear it's a magical act truly I believe that you won't come back am I in an echo that I can not hear come back as a bird when you reappear I know it used to be hot I know it used to be cool for you to stay and spend the night but in the very same way at the end of the day everybody looses the light
4.
BORN BLURRY EYED born blurry eyed born blurry eyed born blurry eyed born blurry eyed if I squint I feel alright details fade and don't excite I don't think I can stay the night I am too blurry eyed what a way to break the ice take a step and the cracks arrive the fireworks are dynamite 'cause so I'm blurry eyed leaving now is impolite blind spots are an oversight home alone and I pick a fight I am so blurry eyed blue skies go black and white pixelated gigabyte I violate my own copyright 'cause I'm so blurry eyed born blurry eyed born blurry eyed born blurry eyed born blurry eyed above zero Fahrenheit it's hard to see the northern lights but I can see the satellites even though I'm blurry eyed brought a knife to a pillow fight I can't do anything right out of focus is out of sight forever blurry eyed born blurry eyed born blurry eyed born blurry eyed born blurry eyed
5.
CALIFORNIA FROWN when a sand dune is full of debris when the landscape is lying to me when the sunset is made in a lab when you want what you already have when the vampires are out on the strip when all the hipsters need new hips when the waves are full of hungry sharks when you write the ending before you start california frown happy smiling upside down when the valleys turn out to be hills when Beverly takes all of her pills when most of Burbank splinters and cracks when all the search lights are on my back when all the parties are stuck on a loop when every tattoo blurs and drops when all the palm trees run run away when we all have something nice to say california frown happy smiling upside down
6.
TENDEREST LOVE gentle feather barely moving twilight skin tight wide eyed sparking slowly kissing barely touching warm breath swirling fingers brushing this is the tenderest love forgive my sin one more time again hold me softly hardly floating tangled inside no one can hide faster now slow it down how did we get this high we didn't even try this is the tenderest love
7.
FLOAT 'TILL I FELL I did not know I could float 'till I fell 'till I fell 'till I fell at the bottom now looking up dust myself off and call my bluff lean out over the edge and find another drop off another cliff these slippery slopes conspire to make me slip hold on with one fingertip I did not know I could float 'till I fell 'till I fell 'till I fell on the top of the top now looking out all I want are sunny days all I get is cloud find a slice of sky while zooming out loose my grip now the end of me how am I slowing now? how can this be? suspended where there is no gravity I did not know I could float 'till I fell I float 'cause I fell (did not know did not know)
8.
SILLY STUPID CONSTELLATION I see my silly stupid constellation shouting 'bout the constant situation I see my silly stupid constellation (and they're staring back at me) I tell them I can handle everything and that I can choose not to think they see the void and they're terrified (and they're terrified) they are toddlers who need attention they are threatened by a bad connection they are so frightened of elimination I gave them time to sit and watch me glowing I showed them time and then it slowed to nothing I saw the tears forming in their eyes but then who are we if we're not an army? I never asked you to try to defend me follow the leader and you'll lose it all (and you'll lose it all) they act like babies who have been abandoned that's why I tell them what I always tell them they can throw the fight and float above it (float above it)
9.
Monster Bomb 03:56
MONSTER BOMB so bored without purpose young men they take chances they use x-ray madness brought a killer to the surface homeless it began to wander radiation left it helpless it's image burns forever with every detonation monster bomb smash your face on the surface reel off a blurry copy keep your eye on your image the dopamine explosion it needs no introduction it leaves no trace of living monolith to reproduction leaving us dizzy spinning monster bomb
10.
SENTIMENTAL ANIMAL I am a sentimental animal I am emotional and mechanical I am fanatical and I am rational I am a sentimental animal like you I got a heart and I got a mind I got a skull and i got a spine I got a hunger that sets my fur on fire I got a story that's locked in time I got a future has to unwind I got a memory filling me with desire I got a lust that tastes like blood I got a brain that's full of dark mud I got an instinct telling me what to do I got a photograph of an old life I got a longing sharp as a knife I got a fear that pushes me back to you a sentimental animal
11.
BREATHING IN A VACUUM I'm breathing in a vacuum I'm breathing in a vacuum I'm breathing in a vacuum I'm breathing in and out and in and out and in and out and in and out I'm under observation light headed on vacation a little respiration and a little perspiration a single inhalation a single hesitation a single exhalation a new exhilaration complete annihilation the air is a sensation I steal a hit of oxygen i'm loosing my intention complete elimination of conscious intention too minuscule to mention this hyperventilation
12.
PARASITE BY MY SIDE 
 I wanna hold it and make it feel happy I wanna know it as part of my family I see it now and it is terrified parasite parasite parasite by my side I found it when I was blind and angry I found it when I was self destructing I found it when I was high as a kite parasite parasite parasite by my side we fell in love when it tried to hurt me we fell in love when it tried to convert me we coexist inside this big head of mine parasite parasite parasite by my side I used to want to eliminate it I used to want to exterminate it darkness is stronger in the absence of light parasite parasite parasite by my side it shrinks away when it feels too nervous as if I blame it for this mental disturbance I tell it everything will be alright parasite parasite parasite by my side I want to thank you for yelling and screaming I want to keep you and so no you're not leaving we will always love this wonderful fight parasite parasite parasite by my side by my side
13.
VENOMOUS BLUE what a heavenly blue I'd like to feel that fresh and new instead I'm spinning here without a clue watching people watching the chosen few just from strumming and humming a tune I sold the the whole blue world to you that party that I was invited to ended up being too good to be true good to be true I had a beautiful view turn venomous blue I wanna sell it to you this venomous blue what a dangerous groove I've got a million units to move my nervous system came completely unglued threatening sunshine and I'm totally screwed my skies are venomous blue I could sell it to you sell it to you the tiny hole I pushed my big dream through left me on the other side with nothing but nothing to do my skies are venomous blue I could sell it to you sell it to you that party that I was invited to ended up being too good to be true good to be true

credits

released July 15, 2022

Written, recorded, performed and produced by Chris Ballew
Co-produced by Pete Droge and Mark Heberlein

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Chris Ballew Seattle, Washington

Chris Ballew is the songwriter and lead singer of the Seattle rock 'n' roll band The Presidents of the United States of America. For 10 years Chris made music for 0 to 5-year-olds and their parents as Caspar Babypants. Now chris makes fuzzy psychedelic meditative fun loopy music for grown-up brains to chill out and do tiny dances and take naps to. ... more

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